"One, two, four?" Frank Omiyale can't seem to remember the snap count. (Photo courtesy of ESPN.com)

Frank Omiyale doesn’t need training camp; he’s already in midseason form.  Yesterday, I read repeated tweets about two consecutive false starts by last season’s offensive line scapegoat Frank Omiyale.  Today, he raised eyebrows with another pair of false starts.  Here’s what head coach Lovie Smith had to say about the falsies:

“We’re not game-ready yet, but that is too many,” Lovie Smith said. “It’s the same guy a few times and we’ve got to get that corrected.

“I think every time you jump offsides, you’re a little over-anxious, ready to play. But you have to be disciplined enough to stay on. We can’t lose a play before it starts. But that won’t be a problem for us; we’ll get that straightened out.”

The Bears would have you believe that bringing in new offensive line coach Mike Tice will cure all.   If Tice can’t teach the Bears offensive linemen to count past two, it won’t matter what else he does.

The Bears claimed that they put Omiyale in a bad spot last season, moving him from his usual tackle spot and tried to shoehorn him in at left guard.  The idea was that this season, by moving him to a more familiar spot, he would anchor the right tackle spot.  Guess again!

Omiyale was worst in the league among guards with a -8.0 overall penalty ranking according to ProFootballFocus.com.  Check out the graphic after the jump.

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Yes, there is such a thing as a Bears Snuggie

If Orlando Pace is going to retire, he won’t be wearing a Chicago Bears Snuggie at the retirement home.   On Monday, the Bears cut ties with the aged tackle, admitting yet another Jerry Angelo and Lovie Smith mistake.  Maybe they could just pin this one on the recently canned pro personnel director Bobby DePaul and kill two birds with one stone?

Pace swept into town in the midst of Cutlermania last April and it seemed like a good move at the time.

It was clear that Pace was a step or three slow all season and an injury midway through the season cleared the way for Chris Williams to take over as the left tackle.  The O-line seemed to perform better when Pace headed to the bench and Williams shifted from the right side to his natural left tackle position.

It was clear that Pace wasn’t going to accept a backup role, but rather than retire with dignity, he chose to get cut.

“That’s a lot of money if they’re thinking a reserve role,” Pace said last month. “I’m sure they’re thinking about it from a business end as well.

“I understand that I was only here to kind of bridge the gap between a year and Chris, so I understand that’s part of the business. Now I have to see what makes the best sense for me.”

Cutting ties with Pace highlights another position of need for a challenging offseason for the Bears.

It was been rumored that DePaul and Lovie Smith often didn’t see eye to eye.  So does DePaul’s ouster mean that Lovie is actually gaining power this offseason?  What is this, Bizarro World where up is down and black is white?  It just doesn’t make sense.

Sure, DePaul had his share of misses, including last season’s questionable pickups along the offensive line like Orlando Pace and Frank Omiyale.  But consider the multitude of draft busts at the feet of College Scouting Director Greg Gabriel.  How do he and Angelo keep their gigs, not to mention Lovie, while DePaul gets the escort out of Halas Hall?  The more I get to know the organization, the more I realize it’s totally fucked.  Happy offseason!

Second Time Around

Even though it’s Week 14, this marks the first opportunity that the Bears will have to play an opponent for the second time this season.   We know that the coaching staff sucks at making adjustments, but I’m really interested to see how Jay Cutler adjusts to a repeat opponent.  Can he find things on film that he can exploit?  Can he correct for past errors?  Heck, can he just stop throwing interceptions?

Measuring Stick

Three of the final four games are against the NFC North and it’s time to see how we really stack up.  We already have an idea about how we stack up to the Packers and Vikings, but the one that really scares me is Week 17 in Detroit.  It could be a painful wake-up call if we lose to the Lions.  At the start of the season, this one seemed like a slam dunk, but I think we’d all agree that this isn’t the case.   (more…)

So we’re on to lucky Week 13 and the luck comes in with the pitiful  St. Louis Rams coming to town to face off against our humbled 4-7 Chicago Bears. The Bears started 3-1 and have gone 1-6 since while the Rams have only been able to muster 1 win all season.

There’s not much left to say about the season.  If the Bears somehow manage to lose this game, Lovie Smith and company might as well go jump in Lake Michigan because they’ll be sleeping with the fishes.  Let’s get right to the Keys to the Game:

Action Jackson

No big secret here – the Rams offense goes through this guy.  Steven Jackson is a beast and the only good thing going for the Rams.  With Marc Bulger on the bench and Kyle Boller at the controls, the Rams offense shouldn’t post much of a threat otherwise.

The Bears are already shuffling their defense around to bring the surer-tackling Kevin Payne into the lineup at Danieal Manning’s expense.

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In Norse tradition, they would put their dead leaders in a ship and send it out to sea ablaze.  The Vikings gave the Bears a Viking funeral in the Metrodome or the Mall of America Field or whatever the hell they call that house of horrors, trouncing the Bears 36-10 in a beating that was far worse than the score indicated.  This was another historic loss that cannot be described as anything less than a complete abomination.

Brett Favre marched the Vikings through the Bears defense more easily than the Nazis rolled through Poland.  Actually, that’s an insult to Poland, at least the Poles threw rocks as the German tanks rolled past.   (As a first generation Polish-American, I feel I can say that.  If it’s offensive to you, I apologize, but too bad).  The Bears barely raised a finger as the Vikes rolled up 537 yards of offense.  537 yards!

Maybe the best way to describe this atrocious effort is to let the Box Score do the talking.  Stealing a bit from Bleacher Nation, here is my enhanced Bears-Vikings Box Score:   (more…)

I’ve been enjoying the Thanksgiving weekend until today.  Today, I might puke up all the turkey I’ve been packing away the last few days.  It’s back to business today as the Bears head to Minnesota to face the 9-1 Vikings.  Buckle those chin straps extra tight Bears, this one ain’t gonna be pretty.  I don’t see many ways for the Bears to beat the Vikes – too many weapons on offense and a dangerous defense. Check out my Game Day live blog and my prop bets for today’s game here.

But just like when Rocky faced Drago in Rocky IV, they’re not a machine, they’re just men.  So here are the keys to victory:

Bad Brett

During Lovie Smith‘s tenure, he has had a relative amount of success against Brett Favre when he was still with the Packers.  It’s time to dial up whatever has worked to get Favre to revert back to those days and find a way to get that old gunslinger back to sling some picks.   It’s unlikely since Favre has only thrown 3 INT’s all season, but one can hope.

Hire a rodeo clown

On the defensive side of the ball, Jared Allen has been tearing it up for the Vikes with an NFC-leading 10.5 sacks.  He could double that number today against the past-his-prime left tackle.  The best chance Orlando Pace and the Bears have is to hire a rodeo clown to distract that crazy redneck.  Either that or hire Larry the Cable Guy to play left tackle.

Aerial Attack

It’s no big secret that Jay Cutler has struggled mightily this season.  2 weeks ago, it was the 5 INT game against the Niners, last week it was a tentative Cutler missing some sure TD throws.  The Vikes are ranked 21st against the pass, so if there’s any chance today, Cutler and the Bears need to play well in the passing game.

Prediction

As I said in the beginning, this one could get ugly.  The Bears have struggled playing in the Metrodome even when they weren’t god-awful.   The Vikes are favored by 10.5 and I think they’re covering that by halftime.  Vikes 35, Bears 19.  Sorry Bears fans, I wish I had better news.  Prove me wrong Bears, prove me wrong and as always…

BEAR DOWN!!!

Orlando Pace got checked for a concussion today.  In case you forgot, the game was last Thursday.

Al Afalava and Zack Bowman returned to practice while Desmond Clark, Garrett Wolfe and Kevin Payne did not.

It was a rough weekend for ex-Bears.  Kyle Orton injured his ankle and is questionable for next Sunday while Cedric Benson had to leave in the 2nd quarter with a hip injury.  The Benson injury isn’t believed to be too serious, but the upstart Bengals are taking out a little insurance policy.

Speaking of injuries, the Eagles’ Brian Westbrook suffered his second concussion in a week and is likely out against the Bears.   The Bears keep catching breaks – too bad we barely been able to capitalize on any of them.

Here are the Top Ten Reasons the Jay Cutler honeymoon is over while Jay Cutler Superstar is using movie titles to describe the Bears.