Last year, the Bears sent two first-round picks (and more) to the Broncos for quarterback Jay Cutler. To date, the move has been a failure — and it has left coach Lovie Smith and GM Jerry Angelo on wafer-thin ice.

The situation has created sufficient desperation to prompt the Bears to overpay for a trio for day one free agents – Julius Peppers, Chester Taylor and Brandon Manumaleuna — which in the short term has removed the sense of gloom and doom that had taken over Halas Hall.

So with the Broncos looking to unload receiver Brandon Marshall, why don’t the Bears try to get him? Sure, the Broncos want a first-round draft pick and the Bears already sent theirs to Denver in the Cutler deal. The Bears should instead dangle their 2011 first-rounder, and possibly throw in a conditional selection based on Marshall’s performance in the coming season.

If the Marshall plan fails, Angelo and Smith likely won’t be there to not use the first-round pick in 2011 anyway. If it works, Angelo and Smith would gladly give up the pick for the ensuing job security.

Though the Broncos may not want to enable a Cutler-Marshall reunion, they may not have many/any other options for unloading a guy they clearly don’t want.

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Friends of the Bears TE say he was not happy about the hiring of offensive coordinator Mike Martz and quietly sent his agent Drew Rosenhaus into “trade request” mode. Now it appears the Bears may have some takers in the Arizona Cardinals or New England Patriots.

The question is can the Bears trade Olsen man for man before some players like Antrel Rolle hit the free agent market? Or is Olsen even enough for a 2nd round pick come April?

As soon as anyone mentions the Cardinals, you can’t help but think of disgruntled wide receiver Anquan Boldin.  The Bears supposedly offered the Cardinals a second round pick last year but the Cardinals wanted more.  Now the Cards are supposedly even more motivated to move Boldin, who’s entering the last year of his contract.  It will be interesting to see if Olsen will be enough to pry the talented wideout from Arizona and get Jay Cutler and Mike Martz and new toy.

In my informal poll, more than half of respondents think that Mad Scientist Martz needs to adapt his offense around the personnel on the team while about 25% think Olsen should get going if the Bears could get a second round pick for him.

The supposed front-runner to assume the reigns of the Bears defense appears to be headed elsewhere.  Early reports indicate the Perry Fewell will accept the New York Giants‘ offer to become their defensive coordinator.  So it’s back to the drawing board for the Bears.

They might as well prop up a cardboard cutout of Buddy Ryan at this point.  This coordinator search appears to be about as well coordinated as our team was last season.  They’ve already missed out on their top two candidates for OC and now they’re scrambling for a backup plan on defense.

Here’s a fearless prediction – no matter who takes pity on the Bears and accepts the coordinator positions, Jerry, Moe and Curly will step to the podium and assure Bears fans that “this is the guy we wanted all along” and “what a great fit this will be.”

Bull-fucking-shit.

I guess it’s fitting that second choice Lovie will be saddled with second and third (or turd) choices at best to help him try to save his worthless job.

Take the Seattle Seahawks as an example of how big boy teams do it.  They pre-interview their top target candidate before they even fire their one-and-done head coach and before you know it, Pete Carroll (and top OC candidate Jeremy Bates) are off to Pike’s Place to catch some fish.  That’s how real teams go about their business, with a plan.

Somewhere, Ron Turner is laughing and all I can say is…

BOOOOOOMMMMM!!!!

Mike Tice salutes you, Bears fans!

Warm up the party boat, Bears fans!  Another name has surfaced in the Great Coordinator Search of 2010 and it’s former Vikings Head Coach Mike Tice.  You remember Mike Tice, don’t you?  He was the Vikings head coach under whose leadership the Vikings had their infamous Love Boat scandal, where 17 Viking players took to the high seas of Lake Minnetonka with a bunch of hookers.

Tice is currently under contract as the assistant head coach in charge of tight ends with the Jacksonville Jaguars.  What kind of title is that?  Is that like The Office’s Dwight Schrute: Assistant to the Regional Manager?

It’s possible that the Bears could hire Tice in a capacity other than full-fledged offensive coordinator.  There is also some speculation that the Bears may be considering splitting up the offensive coordinator duties among several individuals.

It also is possible the team will not have one person handle all of the traditional offensive coordinator responsibilities. They could divvy up the job among two or even three coaches. Tice, for instance, could be the running game coordinator while another coach could be in charge of the passing game.

What is this, the College of Coaches?  How did that work out for the Cubs?  We couldn’t get the plays in on time with just one coordinator!

What a freaking joke!  The only thing that would be the cherry on top of this steaming pile would be if Perry Fewell decides to take the Giants‘ DC job and the Bears come up empty there too.

On the bright side, if Tice does take a position with the Bears, at least he knows how to throw a decent party.

All aboard!!!

Is this the face of the new Bears OC?

Hey, at least we actually got someone to come in for the interview, right? I’d say that’s progress compared to the last two front runners for the offensive coordinator job.

Cincinnati Bengals quarterbacks coach Ken Zampese has interviewed for the Bears vacant offensive coordinator position. According to at least one league source, Mike Martz figures his chances to become the Bears offensive coordinator are limited, so he recommended Zampese to Lovie.

Zampese would seem to be a good fit in some regards.  He’s a young and hard working, so he may be willing to take a risk on Lame Duck Lovie and the Bears.  According to the Tribune article, he is a stickler for mechanics, so that could bode well in trying to straighten out a lot of Jay Cutler’s mechanical flaws that surfaced during many of his league-leading 26 INT’s.

Zampese’s father Ernie hails from the Don Coryell coaching tree, known for high-powered and innovative offenses.

And hey, former Bears quarterback Craig Krenzel gives him his endorsement, so what could go wrong?

Clements, who led the Fighting Irish to a national title in 1973, practiced law in Chicago for five years before joining Lou Holtz’s staff at Notre Dame in 1995. Since then, he’s developed a reputation for developing quarterbacks, most recently Aaron Rodgers in Green Bay.

According to Brad Biggs:

The Bears faxed a formal request for permission to meet with Packers quarterbacks coach Tom Clements today, a day after Green Bay’s season ended in overtime at Arizona, and that request was quickly denied with general manager Ted Thompson and coach Mike McCarthy agreeing they didn’t want their quarterbacks coach calling plays for the Bears next season, a source said.

So there you go.  The Packers are not breaking any rule by refusing the Bears’ request, but it’s kind of a professional courtesy to allow coaches being considered for promotions to interview for such jobs.  The only time they cannot block the request is if the assistant is being considered for a head coaching position.  Is it too late to fire Lovie?

Just another reason to hate the fucking Packers.   I’m happy as hell they lost to the Cardinals.  Enjoy your offseason, dickheads Cheeseheads.

BEAR DOWN!!!

 
The real odds are not quite so dire, as an ESPN blog has the Bears as a 5-1 shot to land Cutler.  (more…)