Even though they weren’t really traded solely for one another, Jay Cutler and Kyle Orton will forever be linked. People forget about the other draft picks involved and focus on the active players involved in the deal. They need to believe that they’ve come out on top. It’s like when you come back from the car dealership, bragging about how you put one over on the dealer and got a steal of a deal on your new ride, while the dealer and his buddies are cracking up about the lemon they just unloaded.
On Sunday night, you will see endless comparisons of Orton and Cutler as the Bears head to Denver to face the Broncos for their third preseason game. Height. Weight. Touchdowns. Interceptions. Wins. Losses. Facial hair. Here’s one angle you are unlikely to see on NBC’s coverage: Cutler and Orton: the drinkers.
Based on this unscientific comparison, I’ve got to give the edge to Orton:
Shirtless chugging: Orton.
Whiskey drinking: Orton.
Dorky Risky Business-looking sunglasses and tie: Orton.
Arm candy: Orton; check and mate.
Hands down, Orton’s the better drunk. Oh, were we trying to figure out who the better quarterback is? I guess we’ll have to see what happens on the field. Either that or they need to set up a beer pong table and line up some shots!
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