Dec 4, 2014; Chicago, IL, USA; A Chicago Bears fan in the crowd during the second half of their game against the Dallas Cowboys at Soldier Field. Mandatory Credit: Matt Marton-USA TODAY Sports
Since making tearful admissions seems to be all the rage, I’ve got one to make – I’m embarrassed to be a Chicago Bears fan. There, I said it. It’s a feeling I’ve had in the depths of my soul for several weeks, but I couldn’t bring myself to admit it. It’s a feeling I didn’t want to succumb to, but as I was gearing up to write a pointless Bears vs Saints preview post, I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.
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I was trying to figure out where it all started, this new feeling I have for the team that I love. Was it during the back-to-back 50-spots that they gave up to the Patriots and Packers? Was it blowing a lead to the Lions and ruining my Thanksgiving? Was it the Dolphins game when Brandon Marshall outed himself as part of the problem rather than part of the solution? Was it the Week 1 home loss to the Buffalo Bills? Did it go all the way back to third preseason game when the World Champion Seattle Seahawks routed the Bears in a dress rehearsal that was a harbinger of things to come? I guess it doesn’t matter; the fact is here we are.
I finally came to grips with the issue this morning. It’s an unseasonably mild, damp December morning in Chicago. I had gotten a Chicago Bears jacket ideal for these type of mid-40’s and damp days. Before the season started, I’d be I begrudgingly grabbed it off the hook rather than my usual black fleece because today was game day. As I exited my car in the parking lot at work, I felt like I was wearing a scarlet letter “C” on my chest. Rather than a sense of pride, I felt a sense of shame.
I work in an office where you have to wear your ID badge around your neck at all time and not surprisingly, my badge holder is a Chicago Bears lanyard. People come up and say, “You’re still wearing that thing?” “What’s wrong with the Bears?” “What’s wrong with you?” I don’t have much of a response beyond, “I”m going down with the ship.” What else can you say?