LOWER THE BOOM!!!
It’s that time again, time to LOWER THE BOOM. Since the Bears’ season has wound down and I’ve been beating up Lovie, Babich and the rest of the organization quite a bit, I thought I’d divert from the world of sports and turn the tables on ‘someone’ who has been lowering the boom on most of us up recently: Mother Nature. Let’s be honest, she’s been kicking our A** in recent weeks. She and Old Man Winter had a bastard-devil child and it is the Winter of 2008-2009. Here is today’s forecast for Chicago:
Brisk and very cold
The high temperature is supposed to be -2°F! As I sit here, it is -6°F. That’s the air temperature, not the wind chill, heat index or any of those made up weather stats! This is too cold to even consider it Bear weather. Good thing the Beloved are already deep in hibernation this year. Not even Kyle Orton’s neckbeard can keep you warm when it’s this cold.
This winter has been absolutely BRUTAL! It already ranks as one of the 21 coldest winters on record for Chicago since they’ve been keeping records over the last 139 years. Even though the winter is only halfway over, we’ve already tallied a full season’s amount of snowfall. We’ve had 26 measurable snowfalls totaling over 38″ of the miserable white stuff.
While I’m at it, let me throw Al Gore, Leonardo DiCaprio and the rest of those Prius driving tree huggers and their Global Warming nonsense into the mix. If you believe it global warming, I suggest you come shovel my driveway! Hey Al, here’s An Inconvenient Truth for you – you didn’t invent the Internet and global warming is a crock!