Bear Fan’s Guide to British Slang

How’s your father? – This is a very old term for sex which plays on our apparent British sensitivity. Rather than saying the actual “sex” word you could refer to having a bit of How’s your Father, instead – nudge, nudge, wink, wink. The sort of old fashioned saying dragged up by Austin Powers.

Hump – If you have got the hump it means you are in a mood. If you are having a hump, it means you are having sex. Care is advised when you try using these words for the first time. It could be embarrassing!

John Thomas – Yet another word for a blokes willy! I always felt a bit sorry for people who were actually called John Thomas. What were their parents thinking?

Keep your pecker up – This is one way of saying keep your chin up. Use with caution as in some places your pecker is also your willy!

Knees up – If you’re having a knees up, you’re going to a dance or party.

Knob – Yet another word for your willy.

Knock up – This means to wake someone up. Although it seems to have an altogether different meaning in the USA! At one time, in England, a chap was employed to go round the streets to wake the workers up in time to get to work. He knew where everyone lived and tapped on the bedroom windows with a long stick, and was known as a “knocker up”. He also turned off the gas street lights on his rounds. Another meaning of this phrase, that is more common these days, is to make something out of odds and ends. For example my Dad knocked up a tree house for us from some planks of wood he had in the garage, or you might knock up a meal from whatever you have hanging around in the fridge.

Narked – In the UK you would say that someone looked narked if you thought they were in a bad mood. In the US you might say that someone was pissed. We definitely would not say that, as it would mean they were drunk!

Nut – To nut someone is to head butt them. Nutting is particularly useful when at a football match.